An Entirely New Life

I never believed when I left my home and marriage in May 2022, I'd truly start an entirely new life. There was always part of me that believed I would be home within the year. I would have worked on my issues and come to terms with who I truly am as a person.

I know who I am. I am a woman with a pure heart. I love deeply. I have come to terms with my past and forged ahead to my future. I no longer wish to hold onto previous grievences, instead wishing only to focus on what is in store for me and my loved ones.

Shawn and I moved in together this month. We are renting a 4-bedroom with Bryan as a roommate. Our littles each have their own bedroom. It's been a whirlwind of packing, unpacking, trying to figure out what goes to storage, trying to figure out what can be thrown away, etc. It's hectic and stressful and fun and I love where all of this is going. I'm slowly getting pictures up, and this is my proudest wall yet:


I love the fact that my and Shawn's littles play together so well. The boys have so much fun together, even though they only get to see each other about four days out of the month.


Sometimes it's hard to understand the trauma that I've gone through in my life, and the healing process can take a long time. I found this little quote on the internet that really resonated with me:


It has been difficult moving into a healthy relationship. Learning how to talk misunderstandings through has been quite a challenge for me. When Matthew and I moved out, I swore my house would not be a yelling household. I've found myself yelling at Shawn a few times, which he has called me out on. (Let me tell you, it pissed me off each time he called me out on it, but what a wake-up call to realize the shit behavior I was presenting!) This man manages to get us through any disagreement we have, even when I am rude or bitchy because I don't know how to handle things in a healthy manner.


It's crazy how love presents itself when we're least expecting it. I shared a life with someone I had known for almost 27 years. After being gone for not even 3 weeks, it occurred to me I didn't even know that man. I met a man and shared a friendship with him, and it bloomed into an incredibly strong love without my realizing it. We're open with each other. I feel free to tell him anything without fear of it being used against me in some way. It's an incredible feeling.

I leave you with a picture of me and my cat. Lucien might be the cutest fuzzy animal ever.


Until the next dirt...

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